Friday, March 04, 2011

The Taming of the Shrew

Meet my daughter's cat, Kiki.  She's a little small for your average domestic shorthair feline, but what she lacks in size, she makes up for in ferocity.  She's a holy terror on small reptiles, birds, and mammals alike.
Meet your common shrew.  This is the third in two days that Kiki has dispatched and lovingly laid on the doorstep for us to tread on.  It's no fun stepping on a small dead rodent in bare feet first thing in the morning when your brain has not yet begun to function properly.  Still, it's better than what happened to a friend of mine, whose cat wounded a bat in the wee hours of the morning.  She brought it to his bedroom to show off her hunting prowess.  Between the distressed shrieking of the bat and the cat's insistent meowing, he awoke in a not-quite compos mentis state, and stepped on the bat, which promptly bit him.  Somewhat alarmed, but still groggy, he flushed the bat down the toilet and toddled off back to bed.

In the morning he dimly recalled his strange dream, which he confirmed to be reality when he discovered the bite mark on his foot.  Since the bat could not be recovered, there was nothing to do but to submit himself to the numerous and painful battery of rabies shots.

As long as Kiki's killing spree continues, I'll be careful not to go barefoot when I get out of bed.  As a double protection measure, I'll refrain from disposing of any bodies until I am fully awake. 

That's probably a good idea anyway, as I think my son has plans for any future rodent corpses.  He heard that tiny critters can be freeze-dried by taxidermists, and somewhere he got the idea of saving little dead mice and what-not, and having them mounted in attitudes of suspended horror, much as they might have appeared in their final moments, just when Kiki surprised them.  I'll be sure to post pictures...


Ran said...

That is one very loving, appreciative cat.

Our's too, brought home little gift offerings - baby rabbits, kangaroo mice - most of them dead first. "Gone shopping, eh?"

As to this "I'll be careful not to go barefoot when I get out of bed" business... Ye gods! You sleep barefoot?

Ken said...

Too funny. Our cat once dropped a large potato bug in my shoe. It is arguably the ugliest looking bug in the world. It was not until I went to work and felt something odd in the area of my toes that I discovered it. Also, one afternoon when I came home from work, I scanned the row of cat toys that the housekeeper would neatly place in a line on our fireplace hearth. One toy stood out, as it did not look quite right. It was a dead mole. I did not have the heart to tell the housekeeper. Cats are funny little creatures for sure.

Ran said...

Hey, Ken is onto something, Steven: Perhaps Kiki could sort-out Woolsey's mole? I don't trust the FBI these days - not with "Holder" playing catch 'n release.

Steven Givler said...

That's awesome. I can just see the mole in the lineup, ken.

I'll put Kiki to work on it. I agree, Ran. She's a much better bet than the Justice Department these days.

And yes, still sleeping barefoot...